Secrets

It’s taken me two years to post this. I kept it in draft all this time ignoring it. I now feel it’s a safe space among us bloggers and readers to post. There is nothing to hide.

I was standing at a bus stop holding my face up to the sun thinking about current relations in my life when suddenly I realized just how many events and experiences in my life have been kept a secret! How many relationships held a secret in one way or another. I was standing there just floored by the sudden thought… the pattern just never occurred to me.

Especially men, my fathers violence towards my mother, my suppressed marriage, my first new relationship after ending a 16 year marriage, and finally my new found love and discovering his addiction to alcohol that regrettably took his life 15 years ago.

Secrets kept are not healthy, when secrets are held within they will begin to simmer, then boil and gradually overflow or explode and thats when it becomes dangerous. There is resentment, grudges and hateful feelings not only to the significant other you are keeping the secret about but to your precious self as well. There will be damage. It’s destructive. You can’t stay boxed in holding on to the secret, because to suppress your feelings and not let your feelings be told only turns negative itself and creates a weakness. One way or another you will be affected. The positive side to this cause and effect is if you catch it in time you can rebel and reveal the truth, reconcile in time before there is too much damage done. You can break away from the solitude, it won’t be easy, their will be challenges but in the long run you will be set free!

Set yourself free!

I’m unlocking one more secret….after all secrets of love is not meant to be hidden only celebrated. I have to make a choice. I’m beginning to feel the freedom.

I am strong, I can do this.

I’m here.

love eva

You are not Forgotten

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You are in my heart mind and soul, you have not gone unforgotten, I carry your memory with me everyday, I think of you always, you were courageous, a soldier, a hero and a messenger to all of us connected to you. I remember you, I remember All of you.

It’s a good memory.

I will continue the fight, for your endeavours live within me and I will do my best to make the world a better place.

Thank you for being in my life. Thank you All for being my friend,

You are not forgotten. Not ever. Not one of you.

eva

My Vision For You

It took me longer than expected to find the words to reflect the value of my work. I wanted it to be as authentic as possible with images and phrases snipped out of magazine that resonates my desires and passion for you to reach a place of awakening.

At one point I overwhelmed myself with snips and I chuckled over my enthusiastic intent to say and deliver the many empowering messages. I did discover however that there was more that met my eye as I searched for those  messages because the activity itself guided me to a realm that impacted me profoundly. I became fixated on an energy that lifted me like a wave and came to a definite conclusion that my life’s work has just begun.

There is more for me to do and offer and grow from and I just can’t wait to discover it all. I am grateful to the stars for guiding me to a place of anticipation and excitement.

I wish the same for you.

love eva

Talking Stick

Raven Eagle Talking Stick carved by George Matllpi

My experience

The nature of the talking stick provides us the opportunity to speak from our hearts and mind. When used in a peace circle it provides the circle to process what is being said and be heard without judgement. It paces our time. When the stick is passed to you, it is only your words being spoken. With intent, your words are received with openness and provide a path to understanding. It’s a tool of communication to solve problems or to gather deeper insights in any situation.

The beauty of the talking stick is the golden moments of thought process we share with reflection, respect and consideration. While the collective sounds of our heartbeat paces our thoughts, we courageously find our voice to share in a peace circle without interruptions. It takes time, presence and mindfulness.

Each time I participated in a circle-surprising encounters of awareness occurs, resulting in a deeper sense of appreciation for humanity. This tradition is so valuable and vital to our ways of communication, if only we can use it more in our systems such as law, government, schools, mediation…did I mention gov’t?

I would like to share my gratitude to Dr. Evelyn Zellerer, founder of Peace of the Circle, for her graceful and impeccable directions and facilitation training on leading a peace circle at my work place, Frog Hollow Neighbourhood House. My experiences were always positive feelings of enlightenment and a sense of common ground.

The photo represents the talking stick given to me as a gift from a friend of mine named Rudy/George Matilpi (First Nations carver Kwakiutl from Alert Bay). It is depicting the Raven and majestic Eagle. I am grateful for his gift and I will use it in our future work with community.

I am honored.

With much love, gratitude, understanding, and friendship.

Eva

I would like to acknowledge that I live, work and play on the unceded and traditional territories of the Coast Salish peoples – sḵwx̱wú7mesh (Squamish), sel̓íl̓witulh (Tsleil  Waututh) and xʷməθkʷəy̓əm (Musqueam) first nations.

Stairway to Love

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Love grows one step at a time. Love is an energy that provides us opportunities to do better, to learn from our mistakes, to understand our pain, heal and supports us to carry on. It’s love’s energy that labours at all our endeavours and challenges and like a stairway to a higher understanding awaits for us to reach out to it but it takes patience, awareness and mindfulness. We can achieve all we aspire with love as our foundation. Know that love is always there for us, around us, surrounds us, and grows through our lifetime one step at at time.

I Who Did Not Die

img_1799  An inspiring book based on two soldiers of the Iran Iraq War written by Meredith May.
Najah an Iraqi soldier left for dead was saved by Zahed a young Iranian medic soldier on the battle field. Both imprisoned as POW, both were claimed dead by their families, both held on to their dreams to a point of manifestation!
One wonders after all the pain, fear, tears, lost and broken spirit how these two soldiers miraculously stayed alive and freed their way out of hell and into the hands of Canada’s haven.  Twenty five years later, here in this beautiful city of Vancouver, the two soldiers find themselves sitting across from each other in the lobby of a non profit organization VAST (Vancouver Association of Survivors of  Torture).  Now the recollection of the past have been written….the untold story is now unfolded….in fact this story will give you renewed hope in humanity. An example of the power of positive change respectfully.

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Photos of the day the book signing took place at Chapters located Broadway/Granville St. Holding hands in a victorious gesture are Najah and Zahed

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On this day the family and friends gathered to support them. it was indeed a memorable and proud day:)

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Surfing….who me…yes! I did it! We did it!

The more power you create in your life the more it grows not only with oneself but with everyone you are connected with. It’s contagious…. energy flows …people  are drawn to it and the more it grows the ripple effect gets bigger, like a wave and before you know it we are all in it together!

Now isn’t that a beautiful vision!

NARIAH TOFINOIMG_3636
Tofino BC 2015