Secrets

It’s taken me two years to post this. I kept it in draft all this time ignoring it. I now feel it’s a safe space among us bloggers and readers to post. There is nothing to hide.

I was standing at a bus stop holding my face up to the sun thinking about current relations in my life when suddenly I realized just how many events and experiences in my life have been kept a secret! How many relationships held a secret in one way or another. I was standing there just floored by the sudden thought… the pattern just never occurred to me.

Especially men, my fathers violence towards my mother, my suppressed marriage, my first new relationship after ending a 16 year marriage, and finally my new found love and discovering his addiction to alcohol that regrettably took his life 15 years ago.

Secrets kept are not healthy, when secrets are held within they will begin to simmer, then boil and gradually overflow or explode and thats when it becomes dangerous. There is resentment, grudges and hateful feelings not only to the significant other you are keeping the secret about but to your precious self as well. There will be damage. It’s destructive. You can’t stay boxed in holding on to the secret, because to suppress your feelings and not let your feelings be told only turns negative itself and creates a weakness. One way or another you will be affected. The positive side to this cause and effect is if you catch it in time you can rebel and reveal the truth, reconcile in time before there is too much damage done. You can break away from the solitude, it won’t be easy, their will be challenges but in the long run you will be set free!

Set yourself free!

I’m unlocking one more secret….after all secrets of love is not meant to be hidden only celebrated. I have to make a choice. I’m beginning to feel the freedom.

I am strong, I can do this.

I’m here.

love eva

You are not Forgotten

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You are in my heart mind and soul, you have not gone unforgotten, I carry your memory with me everyday, I think of you always, you were courageous, a soldier, a hero and a messenger to all of us connected to you. I remember you, I remember All of you.

It’s a good memory.

I will continue the fight, for your endeavours live within me and I will do my best to make the world a better place.

Thank you for being in my life. Thank you All for being my friend,

You are not forgotten. Not ever. Not one of you.

eva

I Who Did Not Die

img_1799  An inspiring book based on two soldiers of the Iran Iraq War written by Meredith May.
Najah an Iraqi soldier left for dead was saved by Zahed a young Iranian medic soldier on the battle field. Both imprisoned as POW, both were claimed dead by their families, both held on to their dreams to a point of manifestation!
One wonders after all the pain, fear, tears, lost and broken spirit how these two soldiers miraculously stayed alive and freed their way out of hell and into the hands of Canada’s haven.  Twenty five years later, here in this beautiful city of Vancouver, the two soldiers find themselves sitting across from each other in the lobby of a non profit organization VAST (Vancouver Association of Survivors of  Torture).  Now the recollection of the past have been written….the untold story is now unfolded….in fact this story will give you renewed hope in humanity. An example of the power of positive change respectfully.

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Photos of the day the book signing took place at Chapters located Broadway/Granville St. Holding hands in a victorious gesture are Najah and Zahed

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On this day the family and friends gathered to support them. it was indeed a memorable and proud day:)

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Thinking Outside the Box vs. Inside the Box, Which Came First?

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I remember when I first heard the phrase ‘Think Outside the Box ‘…   I was astonished because I thought to myself at the time “there’s a box and I have been thinking from within in it?” My reaction was  “Oh how liberating, I’m going to set myself free and think outside the ‘box!”
But then all along as I tried my hardest to be liberal and think alternatively with an open mind, I came across another saying that stated, ‘No need to think outside the box… there isn’t one”
What? Well, you can’t imagine how double free I felt when I read that quote… actually, come to think of it, which came first? Were we born in a ‘box’ and now need to crawl out or we’re we always free and the theory or concept placed us within it? Suddenly realizing to myself all this time the box theory was really quite controlling…it has restraints on our creativity, a bit stunting or stagnating. Interesting isn’t it at just how the opposite happened… at least for me.
So what am I trying to say ?
Let your vision soar, let it fly like an eagle without fear of limitations. Be free and dream away without any rules or restrictions. You’re mind excels way beyond any box, in fact it’s unlimited. You are unlimited !!

What’s Your Vision?

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My vision is to facilitate vision board workshops in the community and workplace. It gives me great joy for it grows my heart fonder for humanity.

A vision of a deserving life of happiness.We are born to be happy in this life, and to empower ourselves  to manifest a vision we dare to dream of our own is an ultimate goal to accomplish. We all have needs, desires, wants and dreams, but rarely do we allow ourselves to reach out and set our minds to attain them. Through the practice of vision boards we provide ourselves an opportunity to bring our dreams to light, to allow to surface so that we may be reminded of what we are worth and deserving of.

Our dreams are on standby waiting for our command!

Tell me, what’s your vision?

My Story

Hello World

I feel this is the beginning of many new things to come……a new journey for me towards social change…….positive change…… it starts here!

 

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History:

My family…My mother and father Italian and Greek arrive in Canada from Egypt in 64. I was 2 years old. My childhood memories were experiences of nostalgic events of love, dressed with domestic violence… I lived with an unyielding fear of the unknown.

Both parents worked hard around the clock. They managed to provide memories of good times with nature, camping, fishing, ocean sides and delicious meals for they both were great cooks.  My father showed me ways to improvise for he was a great handyman with golden hands-there was nothing he couldn’t fix, build or invent. I stood by his side and observed his ways. My beautiful mother showed me compassion, affection, literature and has always had an incredible belief in me, believed that I could accomplish anything my heart desire in my life. My mother became my best friend. However, the anger my parents held between them was enough to give me and my younger brother a fright that managed to make its way into our dreams including our day dreams.

I loved my father but feared him and could not understand why he was so violent towards my mother and brother…yet his Spartan hands and fierce shouts were never aimed at me- I was spared. I loved my mother and could not understand why this was happening, but I did comprehend that free will was beyond her reach. Shared moments of perpetual dreams were our means of survival.  At last, the twenty year love/hate marriage ceased, followed by an exhausted tearful bittersweet divorce. We were free ….free to be, sovereignty was within reach.

Before long I was on my own, but it didn’t take long for me to fall into a similar world I experienced for the first 20 years of my life, it was inevitable; my understanding of love led me to a preordained marriage, one of oppression and dominance. And so the cycle repeated, my conception of love trapped in endless hopeful prayers of change. After 16 years, I reached my sovereignty. It was a mutual decision….but not bittersweet. We went our separate ways and I experienced freedom once again.  It was finally my time, a time of liberty….a new found experience of autonomy. I held my head up to the sky and kissed the rays of sunshine that streamed across my face. With my precious daughters by my side, I wondered just how much freedom is there to obtain.

A new world.

I contemplated how much of myself do I need to repair and how am I going to do that? I tore myself apart contemplating where to apply myself. Why was it so complicated to decide my path-my vocation?   How am I going to give my all? I wanted to cure, heal, save, lead, nurture. I wanted to make a difference….. In many aspects of life.

My spirit led me through a series of education, explorations and meditations. I came across many influential uplifting and empowering literature on the manifestation of our souls, the power within and developed an awareness that we are born in to this world with the intention to be happy……it’s our right…… Imagine that!  I boldly entered where no Eva has gone before.  I trusted that if I visualize and listen to my inner being, I can then manifest my future.

Visualize, visualize….believe!

My heart led the way to my committed work of service to others where I truly feel I am making a difference such as my dream job at Frog Hollow Neighbourhood House. http://www.froghollow.bc.ca/ . Empowering women, growing community, securing food and building relationships are the many areas that resonate with me and now practice. I am blessed to work with such incredible and amazing women in my life for their mentorship, wisdom and perseverance cultivated a strong belief in positive change in me. Especially my mother, she found her calling in education and influenced me to find my way.

I now have a strong belief in the power of our minds to envision and manifest our dreams and desires to reality. I stand by the law of attraction, in attracting positive change, we just have to believe it-know it and practice it. Yes, we can attract what we want in our lives.

There are many authors that write such profound and inspirational books like Deepak Chopra “Secret Book” and Dr Wayne Dyer, an internationally renowned author and speaker in the fields of self-development and spiritual growth has fantastic insights on this subject on his blog http://www.drwaynedyer.com/blog/manifesting-your-desires/.

There are many more authors, books, literature that speak of positive change. My vision is to share with you my experiences and insights I have received as I continue to  learn from them and life and all the people in my path.

I am inspired to be a facilitator of positive change.

Welcome to share your experiences!

May your voice be strong and echo through the hearts of all.

May you achieve all you aspire to be.

Because if I can do it so can you…… I believe in you too.

Please view my digital story on personal change-my first attempt to movie making on social change

https://vimeo.com/124283687

March 8th 2015 International Women’s Day